July 2012? Seriously? Where the heck have I been?

I'm kind of stunned that this blog is still here. Intellectually, I knew it would be but I'm stunned just the same.

I won't go into nauseating detail about the changes in my life since my last post over 3.5 years ago. The highlights:
- We moved into a bigger house in a swankier part of Michiana.
- A fourth child. He was a surprise. He has Down Syndrome. Another twist to my life that I never saw coming. He's helped me grow more than any other kid except my first.
- I am now my boss, or something like that. I took the position that was formerly held by my boss. He's still my boss, but he got promoted too. I manage two departments, 5 direct reports and 3 contractors.
- The changes in my work situation have given me better control over the way I handle conflict. I deal with it a lot more now. I'd probably still curl into a little fetal ball and start crying like a 4 year old if someone physically assaulted me, though. I haven't been yelled at in a while (unless you count my wife), so I'm not sure how I would handle that either.
- One way or another, I only have about a year left with this employer so I'm left with a sense of dread about my future.
- Work has kept me so busy that I had to stop coaching basketball. I haven't coached at all for the last two seasons. I miss it sometimes. Mostly I miss the connections I made with those young men on the team. Basketball was just a means. It was all about building a mentoring relationship with those middle school boys. I really miss that part of it. Screw you if you can't read that without assuming something sinister.

Maybe I'll get around to posting something about my thoughts or opinions again. I do have some new ones I'd like to unload, but history indicates I won't get out here to say anything about them.

I'll drop this one though - my management philosophy:
1) Inspire. To lead people, you must have a vision. You must communicate that vision to those you lead and convince them that it is a vision worth working for. If you cannot inspire people, you cannot lead them.

2) Empower. Once people have the will to work, they must be given the skills and opportunity to succeed. Train them. Guide them. Direct them. Remove obstacles from their path. Do whatever you can to maximize their success.

3) Get the hell out of the way. Leadership is service. Once you have done the things to provide every opportunity for your people to succeed, step aside and let them succeed. Do not modify, tweak or take credit for their work. Do not assume responsibility for their failure. People must grow and do so by choice.

Hmm...choice. I wrote a blog once about there being no rights, no fair and no deserves. I still feel that way, but have decided that we, as God-created human beings, do indeed have two God-given inalienable rights: life and choice. I'll talk about that more another time.

God bless the conflict-challenged men of the world. Maybe I should change this to FLWMWISSOC's (Freakishly Large White Male Who Is Scared Sh*tless Of Conflict) blog. I'd really hate to try to pronounce that acronym though.